The Adopted Child and Death

I’m currently staring at my biological father’s obituary. I found it back in March of this year and since then, have been on a rather wild ride of discovering that part of my life. The one thing I really haven’t done is process the actual death and grieve for it.

I’m at a loss as to how to grieve for a man who is responsible for half of my genetic make-up, but who I never knew and was never a part of my life. Yet, I feel very sad about it. I’m sad that I’m unable to get to know him myself and that everything is secondhand information. I am incredibly grateful to those who have given me information. However, it is different than coming to your own conclusions about someone. Different for me anyway.

These are the times I am appreciative and cursing my empath gifts. Appreciative of the fact I can get a sense of him from pictures. Cursing because I can see his death.

This is becoming a bunch of disjointed ramblings, but I wanted to get a few things out there. I have this bizarre feeling of loss that I just simply don’t know what to do with…

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